Forgive Fat You

mirrors

I cannot lecture anyone on how to lose weight because I’m pretty bad at it. I mean, we all kinda know how to lose weight: eat less calories than you burn off through exercise.  What is hard is determination and resolve.  I don’t have any of that.  What I can tell you is that some girls use food as a crutch and when they lose the weight, they still don’t lose the bad feelings they had about using it as a crutch.  They may transfer the crutch to another vice, or they will hate that fat girl they used to be.  They’re embarrassed they were ever that girl and are ashamed to think about her.  When they do this, they hold on to negative feelings about being overweight and internally hate a part of themselves.  If they can never let go of these negative feelings, they will always feel guilty and ashamed.  If they can’t let it go, it will always be a source of pain for them.

Forgive the fat girl you were. Forgive how you got there and investigate the feelings behind it.  Learn to love her, for she was and still is you.  Your appearance may have changed, but you’re still the same on the inside.  She is a part of you and it’s okay to love her as she was.  Oftentimes, when girls lose weight, they will still continue hating themselves.  They may be 20 pounds lighter, but all they think about is that they could be even lighter.  They are never perfect in their eyes.  They always see that fat girl in the mirror no matter what their reflection shows.  It’s not about loving our physical bodies, but mentally accepting ourselves at every stage.

I realized I’ve never been happy with my body despite my weight. When I was at my lowest weight, I didn’t love myself and I disliked the way I looked.  I gained weight and felt even worse about myself, then I lost it and didn’t feel that much better.  Now, I’ve learned to enjoy who I am as a person and it translates to how I see myself.  I have gained weight at this point in my life, but I can truly see myself in the mirror.  I don’t see the fat girl there who hated herself.

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